I’m feeling quite sentimental.

I want to live in a van, with people I love, with nothing to my name but a guitar and the clothes on my back.

But that’s all a dream.

The old me is dead and gone.

I’m feeling very sentimental, trusting, and bare lately. Not bare in the sense of nakedness, but bare in the sense of my belongings, bare in the sense of my dramatics.

Love is a luxury, she said. I’d rather be in love than dead.

Yay for random blog posts(:

I am actually starting to like twitter…

I downloaded this app for my BlackBerry that let’s me tweet easier than going to m.twitter.com, and twitter’s becoming addicting.

I’m trying to find an app for wordpress that allows me to put up quick simple posts.

Comment me with your twitter, and we shall mutually follow(:

i’m a sucker for these….

Story of your life…

What should they have played when you were born?: beatdown in the key of happy – four year strong

What song will people play at your funeral?: here in your arms – hellogoodbye

What song will you play at your wedding?: supermassive black hole – muse

What song will you play at your 50th birthday party?: america’s suitehearts – fall out boy

If you get your dream life…

What song will you dance to when you win the lottery?: grand theft autumn – fall out boy

What song will you play when you get your dream job?: the feel good drag – anberlin

What song will you play when you discover your own island?: coffeeshop soundtrack - all time low

What song will you play when you rule the world?: you picked me – a fine frenzy

What song will you play when you’re in heaven?: be my escape – relient k

What song makes you feel….

Happy: sugar, we’re going down – fall out boy

Sad: heregoesnothin’ - nevershoutnever!

Sexy: 2nd period: shoot down the stars – gym class heroes

Angry: the dope show – marilyn manson

Jealous: one more weekend – the academy is…

Flirty: this war is ours (the guillotine 2) – escape the fate

Evil: shattered (turn the car around) – OAR

Innocent: boys will be boys – every avenue

Beautiful: breathe (2 am) – anna nalick

What song makes you feel like you’re an armadillo?: too much – all time low

What song makes you feel like you can fly?: headlines read out… – we the kings

What song makes you cry?: everything i ask for – the maine

What song makes you feel like dancing?: jasey rae – all time low

What song makes you feel like being emo?: stay young – we the kings

What song makes you feel like a donut?: a little less sixteen candles, a little more touch me – fall out boy

What song reminds you of your childhood?: undead – hollywood undead

What song reminds you that life sucks?: get busy living or get busy dying – fall out boy

What song makes you eat compulsively?: phone call – forever the sickest kids

What song makes you nervous?: therapy – all time low

What song makes you need to pee?: walls – all time low

This song describes…

Yourself: nothing – every avenue

Your mom: happy – nevershoutnever!

Your dad: you belong with me – taylor swift (HAHAHA)

Your best friend: love drunk – boys like girls

Your stalker: l-o-v-e – nat king cole

Your school: your song – mayday parade

Your life: don’t be so hard – the audition

Your death: shameless – all time low

Your attitude towards life: break your little heart – all time low

be happy for this moment, this moment is your life.

I’ve found that since I’ve graduated, this blog has taken on an entirely different role in my life. I don’t post as much, but I still enjoy getting my thoughts out there.

I’ve come up with my life goal. It’s going to sound weird, but it truly is my life goal, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

When I am old and gray, I want my face to be worn with wrinkles and smile lines. I want everyone who sees me to know that I have lived a full and happy life. I want to grow old with someone I love, and I want to be able to say that I am happy with what I’ve accomplished in my life.

I didn’t really think of this as my life goal until a few days ago. I was walking around town with some of my friends, and I saw an old couple walking. They were arm in arm, smiling, laughing, and looking around. They were ecstatic about living. I didn’t say anything to the people I was walking with, but they truly had an impact on me. Just they way they were so in love with each other, and despite the fact that they were going to be dying soon (they looked to be about 85) they were still so happy. They didn’t have a care in the world. Just laughing and smiling, going on with life. That’s how I want to live through my old age.

Today I will be happier than a bird with a french fry…

I’ve been put through hell and back,

and I’m not going through it again.

bah.

“Inside I hope you know I’m dying,

with my heart beside me,

in shattered pieces that may never be replaced.

And if I died right now, you’d never be the same.”

-Mayday Parade = Love(:

this is the part where you find out who you are.

to hell with your new shit, and whether or not you think you fit in.

-The Maineee(:

I’m becoming a new person. I don’t care about materialistic things anymore, and quite frankly, I don’t care about 3/4 of the people I talked to before. All I care about is being happy, and pleasing myself. After graduation, I realized who is really there for me, and who really cares. I realized that I need to grow up, and stop thinking about others so much.

It didn’t really hit me until this morning, when I was looking at my ex-boyfriend’s myspace page and I realized just how much I don’t like him. I realized that I let him hurt me because I worried about people thinking about me. I don’t anymore, and I’m happier than ever.

I’m rethinking moving to England right after high school graduation, because I think I need to be with my family. We’re having a new baby, moving into a new house, and I’m going to have a new stepmom and stepsister. It’s surreal. I don’t know what to do about that.

Anyway, if you’re getting stressed about everything coming down on you, just sit back and think about who and what you really need. Idid, and not only is a huge weight lifted from my shoulders, but I’m happier than ever. I highly reccomend it(:

I’m so sick of the heat.

It is over 90 degrees here in Wiscosin, currently. I know, Nate, its nothing compared to your heat in Arizona. 

I’ve met some of the best people lately, and I’m really happy with the life I’ve been living. I’m closer to my family, and friends, and I’m making more friends online than ever. I truly love the fact that I can open up to people online without worrying that they’re going to go and tell my friends. As scary as this seems, I feel like I can trust some people that I meet online more than those that I know in real life.

Like Nate, for example. This boy makes me smile huge, and I can tell him ANYTHING. He’s one of my best friends, and he doesn’t even know it. He listens to me and makes me laugh, and thats what a true friend is, if you ask me.

Basically, what I’m trying to say, is that MySpace, Stickam, Facebook, and WordPress have changed my outlook on so many things recently. I suggest you get an account and open your mind, too.

life.

I absolutely love summer. I’m going to make this summer one to remember, too. I think its a good thing to do, considering it may be the last time I’ll EVER see anyone from Burdick. It’s kind of scary, if you think about it. I mean, it’s the big time now. No more hiding behind Daddy for my mistakes; its all me. I’m not in elementary school anymore. People are starting to see me as an adult, and accept my visuals on things. In 4 years, I’ll be able to vote, buy a house, have contracts in my own name, and have accounts in my own name. I’ve always wanted to grow up, but, now that it’s happening, I almost want to stay a kid. I’m scared that I won’t be able to do what’s neccessary to live in the “real world.” One mistake, that’s all it could take to mess it all up. I really need to think about what I want to do with my life now. I need to think about college, and saving money, in order to survive on my own in just a few short years. I need to realize what’s best for me, and stop trying to please other people.

Its scary to think that all of this is happening so fast. I’ll be classified as an adult soon, and I’m scared of that. I don’t want everything to fall on me. I mean, I can get married in a few years. I can make vital life decisions, and I’m scared.

I’m also excited though, because with all of this responsibility, comes the ability to control my own life. I will be able to decide what I want, go where I want to go, and do what I want to do. I’ll be able to see who I want to see, and say what I want to say. It’ll be great.

“Take time to contemplate who you are, and where

you want to go.”

-The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

Lalalala

I said I would keep up my blog,

And so I follow through. Although, now that I’ve graduated… ha, Skonecki, I am going to post whatever I please on here. So, it will be a bit more interesting(:

So far, even though I’ve only really been on summer break for like a day, its going good. Graduation was really great. My dress worked out good, my hair looked great, and my makeup looked better than I expected. I didn’t get the whole year honor roll thing, but whateverrr.

After graduation I went over by my aunt’s with Amanda for a little while. We ate and ate and ate and ate, then we went in the hot tub, haha. After we left, which was at around 7, we went up to Airport Park. We were supposed to just hang out with Nick, but he was running late- naughty, naughty, Nick- and we called Brandon. Brandon and Amanda and I were walking up to Taco Bell, when we ran into Dakota, a girl I used to go to school with. We ended up calling Hayden, and walking around with him. My night was… interesting to say the least.

But, I’m super duper excited for summer. I plan on accomplishing all of my goals, and working ridiculously hard on grasping the concept of macro photography. I also have 8 hours… at least, a  day where I can sit at home and do nothing. Fun, eh? But I’m getting paid $50 a week to babysit my little brother, who just wants to be outside all the time. It should be a piece of cake.